TexasFred’s Famous Christmas Cookies Recipe!

Ingredients:

1c of dark brown sugar
1c (2 sticks) butter
1c of granulated sugar
4 large eggs
2c of dried fruit, such as dried cranberries or raisins
1tsp salt
1tsp fresh lemon juice
1c coarsely chopped walnuts or pecans
2c all-purpose flour
1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequila (silver or gold, as desired)

Instructions:

Take a large bowl, sample the Cuervo to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.

Turn on the electric mixer… beat one cup of butter in a large bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again.

At this point it’s best to make sure the Cuervo is still OK, try another cup, just in case.

Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Pick the frigging fruit off floor…

Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the etrrs, just pry it loose with a drewscriver.

Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity.

Next, sift two cups of salt, or something.

Check the Jose Cuervo.

Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Add a schpoon of sugar, or somefink… whatever you can find.

Grease the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.

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A puppy needs a home for Christmas

I need a favor!!

Do you know someone that wants a puppy for Christmas?

My neighbor has a puppy he’s giving away (FREE!).

It’s a Dachshund, it’s house broken, and is great with kids.

He’s giving it away because his wife says the dog ‘stares‘ at her when she is undressing, and that gives her the ‘Heebie Jeebies’. I think she is just weird!

If you’re interested, or know someone who is, let me know.

Here’s a picture of the dog.